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Almost, by Anne Eliot

At a freshman party she doesn’t remember, Jess Jordan was almost raped.

…Almost. Very nearly. Not quite. Three years later, Jess has managed to make everyone believe she’s better. Over it. Because she is.

…Almost. Very nearly. Not quite.

Unfortunately, until Jess proves she’s back to normal activities, her parents won’t discuss college. So, she lands a summer internship and strikes a deal with hockey jock, Gray Porter: He gets $8,000. She gets a fake boyfriend and a social life.

Jess has no idea Gray signed on for reasons other than money. She also never expects to fall in love. But Gray’s amazingly hot, holds her hand all the time, and makes her forget that he’s simply doing his job. It’s like having a real boyfriend.

…Almost. Very nearly. Not quite.

Gray Porter is hiding secrets of his own. About Jess Jordan. About why he’s driven to protect her, why he won’t cash her checks, or deny her anything she asks.


“Number one: Make at least two friends your own age. Number two: Go places besides your room. Number three: Get boyfriend. Number four: Make sure Mom and Dad notice numbers one through three.”

Okay, so, I’m kinda overwhelmed right now.

I just finished the book and it was a lot to take in and those acknowledgements sort of knocked me on the ass! So, where to start?…

I’d say that if you don’t know yet if you want to give a chance to this book or not, then you really should. It was in my to-read list for a very long time, probably a year or so, and I don’t know why I didn’t read it sooner. It wasn’t that I wasn’t convinced that I wanted to read it or whatever. I really don’t know why. But it took some time.
But now that I’ve read it, well I know it wasn’t a mistake at all and I would have liked for someone to tell me to have faith and give it a try.
So here you go: “GIVE IT A TRY!”

“Almost. Almost.
How I hate that word and the way it defines me.
Almost raped. Almost over it. Almost normal.
I can almost forget. Way worse, I can almost remember.”

This book treats a subject that is hard, and at first you’d think that it is a subject that has already been treated in books a million times. But it’s not. Because this book doesn’t talk about rape. It talks about almost rape. And there is a difference. And I think that’s something that is, in a way, not easy to grasp because it almost happened. And this book is all about the difference it makes when it almost happens.

“Lucky. Lucky. Lucky girl.
Nothing happened.
Nothing happened.”

How Anne Eliot dealt with the matter of rape, almost rape, harassment and underage drinking was really well done. How Jess felt for what she did, had done to her and the consequences that resulted of it afterward. How she felt after all this. The psychology in this book was very subtle and well done and you can easily get in Jess’s shoes, even though it’s a stretch.

“YES. I’m mental. This is why I have a list called ‘how to be normal”

It is very well done. You are not overwhelmed by the fact that Jess has been traumatized but at the same time you cannot escape that fact because it changed her. Marked her. Broke her. And she tries her damnest to get back to normal. Hence the pretend boyfriend.

“Person slaughtered: Me.
Method used: Dimple.
The guy has a dimple. Of course he does. To match the Hollywood chin divot. To make the lump on my forehead pound even harder.
Pointes for Gray Porter: 3,000,000-bajallion, trillion to the millionth power.”

It is no easy subject to write about and no easy subject to read about either, but it is so well done that you can read about it and actually enjoy yourself, the story and the characters while reading. The fake boyfriend twist gave this book the lightness it needed I think and I loved falling for Gray the same way Jess did.

“He’s so good at his job, that I’ve fallen for him, the mirage of him being my boyfriend, all of it. Like everyone else. Like an idiot.”

I really loved this book. It was sweet, funny, moving, deep and intense. It’s one of those books that follow you long after you’ve turned the last page.
You will fall in love with Gray and how good he is. You will admire Jess for her courage. And you will remember this book for a very long time.

“I’ll make sure you forget every guy but me, Jess Jordan. And that’s a promise I mean to keep.”


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